Happy Birthday Jesus!

Progress

I don't feel like I've posted many details about our adjustment struggles...but there have been many tears and frustrating days...weeks...but God is GOOD and we are getting there. We had a great visit with our social worker last week. Silas reacts to our parenting in such unpredictable, interesting ways...so we've been trying to analyze and dissect what has happened to him in the past to condition him this way. But the bottom line is that we will never know about his life pre-Vernon. I need to get past needing an explanation...it is what it is. Thank goodness that God doesn't make me explain my every illogical behavior! :) So, hard core prayer is what this momma needs to commit to. I am so thankful for a husband that is ever present and ready to serve his family extra when I feel like I can't do it anymore. If I was capable in my flesh to do what God called me to do, what glory would be in that for Him?? So, honestly my hard days are me trying HARDER rather than just giving it over. When will we learn?? :)

On a positive note Silas has made huge strides on his English. He understands just about anything we say and has really increased his vocabulary. Sometimes he has this southern accent as he says his name. It is really quite adorable. When we leave somewhere he says "Later" like he is all that! He loves to TRY to count, paint, torment his sister :), and play cars with his brother. Silas insists upon getting a "piderman ban-aid" (spiderman band-aid) for every mark on his body....which are quite numerous for this rambunctious boy. I don't know where he gets his energy.

Here are some recent photos:

2nd Family Photo-Happy Thanksgiving!

Silas meeting Red & Susan and playing w/cousins.

Look at all these Bunn grand babies!

We celebrated Christmas on Thanksgiving w/the Bunn family. Mya loves hippos
and received one from Uncle Matthew & Aunt Vicki.

The older boys received dart nerf guns from Uncle Kevin. Cale had so much fun, he cried when
everyone had to leave!

Silas is officially a member of the Bunn family. He loves black olives!

Halloween Pics

This is sad, but this is our first family picture!

Adorable cousin Noah

Standing Before the Judge

We went to court today at the big Polk County Courthouse (fairly impressive actually) to get our foreign adoption recognized in the state of Missouri. It was a bit nerve racking to get sworn in and asked to take the stand. :) But it was relatively painless, and Ashenafi is officially Silas Ray Ashenafi. Here is a picture with the judge. Silas wanted to sit in his lap!

Family Time

Cale with his Grandma and Great Aunt Regina

Silas & Mya like to torment one another, so we cherish these poses!

Kids with Nonna and Granddad

Cale with Great-Grandma Sally

Silas meeting his great-grandpa Ray.

A Weekend of Fun

We went to St. Louis over the weekend for some much needed family time.

Transportation Museum

Daddy and Cale at the Cardinal Game

Our baby girl turned 3!!! Happy Birthday Mya!!!

Cale turned 5 today!

Our 4 lb 12 oz bundle of joy, Cale Thomas

God has some big plans for this big hearted little guy. We are blessed to be a part of them!

Initiations

Silas has been initiated. We had family worship last night and fixed the traditional popcorn/peanut M&M combo...and Silas loved it. It is a Bunn thing! He and I had a hard day yesterday, so it was so neat for me to see him participate and have so much fun.














Then, the other night (when mom was having some much needed time away), the kids played Kung Fu Panda and the furious four with daddy. The older kids are obsessed so it is only fitting that Silas participate too. If you are a bad guy, it is not safe for you at our house right now!







Silas also had his first haircut today. It didn't go well, but whose does?? :) Look at that handsome fellow!

Testing the Waters

This week has been tough as Silas is testing his boundaries. Professionals tell us that older kids will often test their adoptive parents to see if they are committed. All the other adults in their lives have been in and out, so they are trying to figure out if you are serious-if you love them. We are not sure if any of this pertains to Silas or if he is just being two! Our social worker gave us some great advice and encouragement yesterday, and we are very grateful for her wisdom.

I realized that I was so concerned about getting it right-about doing all the necessary things to bring Silas stability that we were missing out on him-just enjoying him. I actually tend to do this with all three kids. :)

Here are some fun bath time pics. Silas loves the water.

Silas likes to kiss on the mouth.

My sweet babies

We are Home

We are home-and home has never felt so good! Tony and I missed Cale and Mya terribly. We both lost it a couple times on the way home, and then I was so emotional coming off the plane that I think I scared the kids. Crying when you are happy is not something that they understand just yet.

Silas was such a good boy on the plane. We had a blow out diaper and a couple rough moments, but not bad for a little guy. We left our hotel at 10:30 a.m. MO time on Friday and didn't get home until 8:00 p.m. on Saturday, so mom and dad were tired and stinky!

I know we are still in the honeymoon phase :) but the other kids are doing so well with Silas, and he is responding well to them. He avoids the cats, but he is really scared of the dog.

Thank you for praying for our safety and our health while we were away. And a big thanks to Don and Laslee for holding down the fort at our home. Internet was also very difficult to access, so we are grateful for Carey's help in getting our messages posted on the blog.

Pictures

Meeting Silas:

Kids Greeting Silas at the Orphanage

Patience is a Virtue

We left for the Embassy this morning and got all settled in…only to find out that our appt was rearranged for this afternoon. So, we left and headed for the coffee factory to load up. Between the long wait there and a stuck bus plus 14 crying kids and dirty diapers it was 1:00 already and we were heading back to the Embassy. No lunch and no naps was not a good combination for our 2 hour wait.

Silas had two meltdowns while we were out today. It would be difficult for any 2 year old, but add strangers for parents to the mix and it isn’t a pretty sight. I don’t think that the orphanage told him no very often, so he gets extremely upset when he doesn’t get his way. He cries so hard he starts coughing and goes into hyperventilate mode. On his first one Tony just held him close and let him do his thing. It breaks your heart to see him so upset. Silas finally calmed down and had a cat nap. With each successive meltdown, it seems to be less severe. I don’t know if this is a coincidence or if he is starting to feel some comfort from us. We feel like first time parents all over again because dealing with his emotional abandonment trauma is new territory. How do we extend grace yet be firm and consistent? One day at a time…

I think Silas also has some survival, “scrapper”, instincts from being in the orphanage. He is very territorial with his new things…his toys, his sippy cup, everything. Silas also grabs his food with both fists and just shoves it in as fast as he can. And then he tends to push others and be aggressive to get his way. When he is uncomfortable or scared, however, he turns into a cuddle bug and becomes very shy. This could be good for the plane ride home!

We are very grateful for a great Embassy appointment. Silas’ Visa should be ready by 10:00 tomorrow morning, so we can come home tomorrow evening! Yeah!!!!
Cale and Mya, you are both going to have to be patient as we teach little brother how to share. He is going to need you guys to teach him how to be a part of a family. :) Just a couple more days!

God is SOOO Good!

Silas slept all night!!! Yeah!!! We did/are going to have some issues establishing some discipline with him. He is hitting, biting, and pinching. We tell him aye (no) and he just laughs. We find ourselves saying kuru (gentle) a lot. Nah means to come and he steps backwards when we say it. We have an ornery one on our hands! J But after today’s experience, I’m confident that the Lord has big plans for this little boy!

The trip to Kids Care Orphanage today was such an experience. I can’t even tell you what a blessing it was for Tony and I to visit the place where Silas lived for four or five months. As soon as we walked through the guarded gate, kids surrounded me and just tugged on him and called him by name. They were so excited to see him. The nannies did the same thing. The director told us that Silas was a very popular kid there. We saw it at the transitional home too. People love him!!! It was so exciting to see that he was well taken care of, but it was also very sad to know that he is going to be taken away from all that he knows. These kids and nannies communicate with him and we can’t. However, one thing that was so interesting is that Silas didn’t want to go with him. He wanted to stay with us. What
all can this 2 year old little guy understand? I carried him around
in my sling so that he would be secure in knowing that we were not going to leave him there.

The kids at the orphanage sang and played games in front of us. We couldn’t understand their words, but they looked like Duck, Duck, Goose and Red Rover. It was neat to see them have fun. We then had the opportunity to go inside the orphanage and love on the babies and see where Silas used to sleep. One boy became very attached to Tony.
I hope seeing us brings them hope and not sadness. Most kids seemed very content. There was one boy that had something wrong with his eye and a blind little girl that had some mental issues. You just wonder what will happen to those.

The director of Kids Care told us that they have started a couple programs to assist families. They provide meals to poverty stricken homes and provide assistance to moms that are bed-ridden. The goal is to keep the kids in their families as long as they can. What a neat ministry, and what a way to share God’s love.

We also found out that Silas’ mom had to fill out papers and go to great lengths to get him in the orphanage, which just affirms to us that she loved him. She also gave him the name Ashenafi. Back home, he has become Silas, but here it seems strange to call him that because so many recognize him and call him Ashenafi or Ashu. It is neat to see how he responds. So, I think we are going to torture our child J and make his official name Silas Ray Ashenafi Vernon. During this transitional time, we find ourselves calling him his African name more often than not.

Tony and I feel so covered with prayer. It is so amazing. I personally have reacted to situations in positive ways that my flesh would not have normally. I feel more relaxed…I’m taking more in…seeing God work in every detail. He has shown up every time-in small things and in big things. I have testimony after testimony.This trip is life changing and such a spiritual journey for us. THANK YOU for praying for us!!! And thanks again for the much needed donations. Our group was able to stock pile both the TH and the orphanage.

Gotcha Day

We loaded up the van with our donations for the Transition House then headed to the post office district to do a little shopping before lunch. It was quite a time. We are not good at bartering!

After shopping, we drove to our lunch spot which was an Italian restaurant with Ethiopian art hanging all over the walls. It was awesome! The food was great but the conversation we had with Robel (AWAA Travel Coordinator) was extraordinary. He has an amazing testimony and a big heart for street kids. We had already sat down and the waiter had squeezed a chair in between Sarita and me for Robel. It was rather strange…but okay. Apparently, God wanted us to hear what he had to say because he blessed our socks off. Our minds are already turning as to help his ministry here.

Next, we headed to the Transition Home to pick up our little ones for good. They will be with us the rest of the week so Sarita and I deemed September 1, 2009 as Gotcha Day. Some of the people in the group took pictures for other families waiting to travel and also give the kids care packages from their moms and dads in the States. It was really cool to see how much joy these kids experienced when receiving the gifts. They just lit up with excitement and thankfulness; a good reminder to take pleasure in the small things in life.

We then talked with the head nurse about Silas’ medical history along with his eating and sleeping schedule. The nanny brought Silas to us and he was groggy because they woke him up from his nap. His main nanny’s name is Shinti. She hugged and kissed all over him and said bye several times. You could tell she really loved and cared for him.
Sarita just lost it!

At the hotel, we got out the beach ball and Silas started going to town kicking it around the room. We grabbed some dinner at the restaurant and cleaned Silas up a little bit. We put him to bed and he was out in about 20 minutes hugging the monkey that Cale gave him.
Thanks Buddy!

Our Wednesday and Thursday schedule have been switched so we will be visiting orphanages tomorrow then the Embassy on Thursday. Pray for us as we visit the orphanages. It is emotional enough seeing the kids at the Transition Home so I can’t imagine how it will be visiting a place with kids that have not been placed with a family.

Cale and Mya, we hope you are doing well and we miss you guys a ton.
We showed Silas a picture of you guys and he grinned from ear to ear.I think he will be excited to see you guys. We love you!

Meeting Silas

We started out our morning with a paperwork party at the guest house and then ate at a really neat restaurant. There was much pressure to order something fast, so we could get on the road! At the transitional home, they brought out our kiddos one at a time in alpha order…so we were last! We teared up watching all of the other families so we knew we were going to have a difficult time keeping it together! When they finally brought out Silas, he was very timid and wouldn’t look at us, but he came to us okay. We bribed him with a toy car and some fruit snacks. Tony began blowing bubbles, and he cracked this half grin…he was trying so hard not to smile at us. He finally couldn’t stand it anymore, and we were able to see those big brown eyes twinkle. Seeing him smile at us was priceless. And we did find out that our boy is extremely ticklish! We were only able to spend about two hours with him, but it was great to see him open up a bit. He initiated sitting on our laps a couple times, but he wasn’t much of a cuddle bug, but rather enjoyed playing ball with his daddy.

Tonight’s dinner was at an authentic Ethiopian restaurant. It was such a neat experience. We had some unidentified food-some good, some not-and experienced some native entertainment. It was great to see more of their culture. We need to share this with our son. I have to admit that I was a bit disheartened at the airport yesterday. We just had some negative experiences with the people, but today has been great. They are so hospitable and gracious. They are very serving, and oh are they beautiful! It is just amazing to see the sever poverty and the wealth on the same street. There is a luxury spa on the corner and so is the local farmer with his donkeys! The sights are unbelievable. And the driving is frightening! Wow-it is every man for himself! There are no traffic signs and very few lanes. We are shopping in the morning, and then heading back to the transitional home after lunch to pick up our babies!!!!

We are in Africa

After tearfully saying good-bye to our children, we left Springfield yesterday morning and have finally arrived at our hotel. It took us two hours in the Ethiopian airport to get our Visas, get our luggage, and pass through customs. We are ready for showers and a good night of rest. It is such a strange feeling to stick out like a sore thumb…to not understand what people are saying…to be the minority. This is definitely out of our comfort zones. We do have a few praises. On our flight from Chicago to D.C. we sat by three Ethiopian brothers who graciously gave us a crash course in Amharic so that we could better communicate with Silas. I was so excited. God is so good like that. So, here’s a few for you. Tony is Silas’ a-baa-t (dad), and I am Silas’ en knot (mom). Maybe we’ll get to use some of this on him before the week is out.When we arrived in D.C., still praising the Lord for our new friends, we met several other adoptive families-some from our agency and some not. We were able to eat dinner with them and just relax a bit before our long haul. What a blessing to not be walking this road alone!

Cale and Mya, we miss you tons already!! We have already placed our family picture by our bed-one that Laslee gave us at the airport. Thank you for that small gift. It brings much comfort.

MANY THANKS!

We are doing some last minute packing tonight and holding our breath as we weigh our luggage. Here is a pic of our donation pile...and actually this was several days ago so we have more!


Several close friends and family members have contributed but the bulk of this came from our Duck Creek family. They have been amazing! Thank you! Thank you!

Also, we received some pictures from the Gillman family today. They, too are such a blessing. I know that we leave tomorrow and will see Silas on Monday but before today we only had 4 snapshots of him and Kim sent 8 we are so grateful. Mya wanted to know "What's his mommy's name?" It was precious...but maybe she doesn't understand as much as we thought she did!


I was feeling rather apprehensive about the plane ride, but after seeing his sad face I'm ready to go!!!! All of the pics shared this same face-it just rips our hearts out to see him like that after all of his other happy faces. Hand on buddy, we are on our way!!!

Thank you for all of your prayers and encouragement. We are so excited and so nervous at the same time. Hopefully, our internet connection will be okay and we can share our experiences with you.

Concrete Travel Dates

We found out yesterday that August 29th is our official departure date! Praise the Lord for the small but HUGE blessing of not having to change our plane tickets. Right now I know of 10 other families across the U.S. that will be traveling with us. We are the largest group that AWAA has had up to this point.

A really neat family in Ozark (Gillman's) are in Ethiopia right now picking up their two kiddos. It is incredible to be able to share this experience with another family so close. We've been tracking their blog as they have met their kids. As exciting as it will be to pick up Silas, Kim Gillman reminded me that he has suffered great loss. And now we are about to transport him again to a whole other world...away from his culture...his heritage...anything familiar. My heart breaks for him to suffer loss yet again, but I KNOW he needs us...and we need him. We are learning so much along this journey.

The Gillman's also took a care package with them to give to Silas. It contained a picture of our family, a comfort blanket made by grandma, and a new outfit. So, today Kim met our son and loved on him for us!!! I know this little guy is only two, but I hope that he can look at our picture and somehow know that we are connected.

I think our biggest prayer concern right now is that we would throw off all expectations about our trip and meeting our son...that we would be flexible...and that we would be spiritually ready to take in the hurt we see and share the hope that we have.

Cale's first day of school

Today is the official start of our family calendar revolving around the education calendar! This is new for us! Cale looked so big with his backpack. And of course, Mr. Social Bug didn't have any issues walking into Mrs. Malone's preschool class. :)

Silas Ray Vernon is the newest member of our family!!!

Praise God we passed court today! Thank you for all of your prayers. I felt them-I did, but I still felt like I could get sick just waiting for the phone to ring. Poor Cara had to deal with me and my nerves today. I love her for doing that so graciously!

We can finally post some pics. Here is our first glimpse on June 30th of our little boy:

We received a July update and received these two pics.



















Love those eyes!!!! And daddy is already drooling over the thought of Silas loving sports!

So...the next step is just to wait for travel confirmation. We already have plane tickets in hand for August 29th (had to book as they were filling up) so hopefully the paper work will get where it needs to go in time.

Thank you for your continued prayers and support. We are so excited and yet so nervous all at the same time. We KNOW this will bring huge changes to our family-some fun and easy and some that are more difficult and not so fun. But we also KNOW that God has hand picked this little boy for our family.

Courts are Closing

It's offical-the Ethiopian courts will be closed down from August 22-October 6. One huge praise is that the courts usually close the first part of August...so we were able to squeeze right in there. I have to admit there is a little fear in me because if we don't pass on Tuesday, we will probably get bumped to October to hear our little guy's case again. HOWEVER, we have so much to be thankful for. There are so many families adopting from Ethiopia right now that have had such huge struggles and hardships. We have been protected from so much. No matter what happens on Tuesday, GOD IS GOOD and is in control! His timing is perfect. I keep thinking that judge has so much control over our family right now...but have to remind myself that God is over the judge...this brings me peace...but every once in awhile the knot in the stomach comes back! Of course this is Sarita blogging as Tony is a cool as a cucumber. He is always faithful to balance me out! Another blessing in the Vernon home...

"I will help you be brave"

Sarita and I went to the doctors office last Friday to get 4 shots in preparation for our trip to Ethiopia: typhoid, hepatitis A & B, and tetanus. It was one of the greatest dates we have had in awhile. You should try it! Just kidding. We took the kids with us to the office and explained to them why we were going. We just wanted to make sure they didn't think they were getting any shots and it was only for mom and dad. Well, after this settled in, Cale and Mya decided they were going to step up and help us be brave while getting our shots. The whole ride there they kept saying, "Mom and dad, we will help you be brave!" Sarita and I just looked at each other with a chuckle and melted hearts and thanked them in advance.

So now we actually enter the room to get our shots and I go first. The nurse gave me 2 shots in each arm and with each shot Mya's face just grimaced in pain as if she were receiving the shots. That is about all the bravery I received from my kids. :) Then Sarita steps up to the plate and before the nurse could administer the first shot, Mya jumps off her chair and grabs my wife's hand. Mya looks at her with her big brown eyes and emphatically says, "Mommy, I am going to help you be brave!" I am sure it helped ease any pain Sarita may have felt.

Whew.....finally some blogging!

Whoooohooooo! Our blog is finally up and running. We have been meaning to get to this but haven't had a chance. You will probably see a lot of posts dated today since we want to catch you all up on some things going on. So you will probably think, "Wow, those Vernons need to get a life". We are just excited to fill you all in. :)

There are a lot of things going on in our lives right now, most notably our adoption of Ashenafi, and it has made us think about our relationship with our Heavenly Father.

For starters, the adoption process. This entire journey has been a roller coaster of emotions and effort but most of all an awakening in our trust and faith in God. This is one process you have absolutely no control over. All you can do is pray and pray and pray trusting the Lord is taking care of it. I wonder if this how God feels with us sometimes. The ups, the downs, the joys, and the sadness; the ebb and flow of emotions. One day He is excited the next He mourns. All He wants is for His child to be closer to Him, for His child to truly meet Him and discover the abundant love He gives. Maybe adoption was created so we have a better insight into our Creator's heart. Hmm....something to wonder about.

We have been teaching our kids catechisms and scriptures over the past couple of years, well Cale at least. So each time they memorize a certain number of catechisms or scriptures, they are given a reward for their hard work. Two weeks ago, they reached their goals so we gave them their rewards. You should have seen the look on their faces. As parents, we were so proud of their accomplishments and we're overjoyed by their excitement. I wonder if this how God feels with us sometimes. Does He get excited about our little accomplishments in life? Is He overjoyed when we do something to further His kingdom, no matter how small it is?

Isn't it cool to serve a God that is personal and relates to us in many different ways? Wow! I think God knew what He was talking about when He said He made us in His image.