Losing Gracie

My husband walked around yesterday in a quiet disbelief as the events of last week came crashing in. Last Monday we were at the funeral of our almost 3 month old niece Grace. The loss was so sudden that it seems surreal. We are the uncle, aunt, cousins...we are not used to seeing her everyday yet our hearts hurt because we were denied getting to know her and because our family is grieving. Tony's sister Patience and our brother in law Matt live in KC. Gracie was and is blessing #3.

I don't think we ever questioned God as to why He chose to take her. We know He doesn't owe us any explanations. He gives and He takes away...His timing...His glory. What we struggle with is knowing how our family is supposed to move on. God promises that He won't give us any more than we can handle. Well, how are they (we) supposed to handle this one? Our kids have been watching Jelly Telly (highly recommend it), and they say that faith is believing who God says He is and believing what God says He will do. Do we have faith in what He promises in His Word?

"Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning: great is your faithfulness." Lamentation 3:22-23

That verse has taken on a whole new meaning for us. When tragedy strikes sometimes it is hard to see God work. Matt and Patience have been so vulnerable through this that we have been blessed to count the ways that God has provided for them, even in the small things. He provided a beautiful, debt free memorial service with awesome friends and family, He prepared the hearts of our other two nieces to understand heaven and rejoice about Gracie meeting Jesus, and we have seen the outpouring of community provide for their daily needs as they seek to feel somewhat normal again.

We need God's grace and mercy to be renewed and rain down EVERY morning...we just stop and ask and see it in the tough times. God is good and His promises are true. So that is how God is going to give them (us) the strength to handle this loss. We count the compassions every morning. We stop and give Him glory for how He has met our every need...today...and then start all over tomorrow.

We want to be a changed family...a family of great faith...a family that believes what God says He will do.

May Recap

May was an exciting month in the Vernon household.

Milestones:

*Tony and I celebrated our 10 year wedding anniversary! My husband's gray hairs are testimony of what an incredible trip it has been!

*Silas is officially completely potty trained. The monthly budget will finally be rid of diapers and pull ups. Hooray! Don't be offended when Silas asks you about your "big boys". He thinks everyone gets a thrill from wearing big boy underwear.

*Cale finished preschool. Is it possible that we have a kindergarten student on our hands? We have really toiled over the decision on where to send him in the fall. Options are great but stressful! We are finally peaceful about having him attend Polk County Christian School again next year. One year at a time...one child at a time...that we can do!

*We left Silas at a sitter's house for the first time (excluding family and Sunday School). Either he did very well or Ms. Debbie offered him much grace! Papa has been our sitter ever since we brought Silas home. It has been monumental in Silas' attachment and stability. Plus with his anger and behavioral issues, I'm not sure anyone but Papa was up for the challenge. :) We praise God that He has grown our son and brought us through that season. We are grateful for my dad, and are also blessed to have Debbie.

Making Memories:

We took a relaxing trip to Alabama with Tony's parents to visit Red and Susan. They are not family by blood, but family by all other definitions. Our stay was full of strawberry pickin', jelly makin', horse back riding, mud puddle jumping, eating, and reclining!