Joys

A friend of ours who had just come through a tough season made the comment in a recent email that she was not just surviving-she was thriving. I've been thinking so much about that. Our family, too, has been in survival mode. The past season of helping Silas to work through his anger, guarding our own hearts, and just learning how to parent three small children was hard...but we are THRIVING now, and I don't think my attitude has reflected that. Tony and I were talking about the JOYS of parenthood-relishing in each child and celebrating their unique qualities. When life gets chaotic, those blessings are overlooked at our house.

We took a trip to St. Louis this week to finish up some paperwork for our second adoption. This forced family time was great in making us slow down and really SEE our kids. Here are some of the JOYS we noted:

*Witnessing Silas' compassion come out when he sees others hurt-especially his momma!
*Mya's awesome attitude when she plays games-not caring if she wins or loses.
*Cale's cuddles-he give the best hugs!
*Hearing our kids sing and/or quote the Word of God.
*Mya's crazy hair and seeing how it fits her own sense of style.
*Silas' appreciation of ANYTHING I cook.
*Spending quiet afternoons reading chapter books with Cale.
*Seeing Mya carry frogs and power tools in her Cinderella purse.
*Hearing Cale reprimand his daddy for driving too fast.
*Constant Hugs/Kisses and I love you's from Silas.
*Mya's fetish to smell everything. :)
*Cale's love for people. He never meets a stranger, and he often bridges uncomfortable situations with love.
*Silas has great determination and will try many times before he asks for help or gives up.
*Seeing the motherly instincts God has given Mya. She loves babies!

Thank you God for entrusting us with your children! And help us to honor and cherish them with your love.

Adoption Update

Our homes study was completed this week (so grateful for our social worker, Shannon), and we were able to send it off with our I-600 application to the government. After our paperwork and fingerprints are approved, this document will be attached to our dossier stack of paperwork and sent to Ethiopia! All of that to say, we are a month or two out of officially waiting. After that, our wait time is only known by the Lord. Our agency is not setting our expectations up at all on a time frame. We are requesting a 2 or 3 year old little girl and there really isn't an established pattern for kiddos over 2.

If I keep this about obedience to the Lord and paperwork, it is so much easier. But when I start to call her baby sister and think about what she may be facing right now without a family, it is harder to be patient. I cried putting together our photo pages for our dossier. Attached was our family picture of 5...she is missing. We have a little girl out there that belongs here. And then I just prayed, "Lord help me love her." Attachment was hard with Silas, and I need to start praying for my heart right now.

Here is what one adoptive parent in Ethiopia said about an orphanage:

"We are here in Ethiopia for court. We visited 2 orphanages today and one broke our hearts and needs URGENT help!!!! KVI orphanage. There were no crib mattresses in the cribs and no babies had on diapers! Pieces of ripped up sheets in the place of diapers!!! we were so disturbed that we went out and bought 6 crib mattresses for KVI and delivered them. Problem is they are NOT plastic covered so they will get ruined quickly! Babies are soaking wet because of no diapers."

We are so anxious to go and bring our girl home, but also to help out too. We want to make our trip count. So, we will be calling on you all to help out with donations when the time gets closer. Their needs might look different then. It just breaks your heart. How can we have so much and they have so little? Our cups run over. I wish this sinful flesh didn't have to be reminded of that so much.

Celebrating with Aliens and Lady Bugs

Weekend of Emotions

We spent last Saturday at my in-laws celebrating Cale's, Mya's, and our niece Sara's birthdays...and then visiting the grave site of our niece Grace. The cemetery was so surreal and peaceful and then we walked back in Tony's parents house to hear the sounds of squeals and laughter. It was such a good reminder to not take their little precious lives for granted and to be thankful for the time that God has given us. Our cup runneth over!

Did I mention that there were tigers and a band for entertainment?

Take Me Out to the Ball Game...

Last weekend was our second annual trip to St. Louis. This was Mya and Silas' first baseball game, and it was Cale's first time to know the players and truly be interested in the details of the game. It was great to see the joy as he took it all in. Go Cardinals...sure wish they would have actually won!

One Year Ago...

One year ago today, Tony and I were in Ethiopia meeting our SON Silas for the first time. We had no idea what was in store :)...it was a hard year...and a great year! God has given us an incredible love for this ornery little boy, and He has used that love to soften the heart of Silas. Praise be to God for His incredible gifts!

School Days

Cale started Kindergarten today, and Mya went to preschool. They were so excited. Their favorite part of the day was eating lunch at school with the big kids. Oh, wouldn't it be nice if those simple things would always bring them such joy!

Cousins

Our church had family camp this weekend, and we shared a cabin with Seth & Nicki. It was a great time of fellowship (well it was for us-we can't speak for them!) . It's neat to have a BC (before children) moment...staying up late, playing cards, and laughing until your side hurts...pretending that you won't be up in a couple hours to the sound of someone crying.

Two of the hi-lights this weekend were hearing my sweet nephew call me "C-tah", and then just standing amazed at how God puts families together. Would you ever guess that these beautiful, polar opposite boys would be cousins? :) I love it!

Big News

We have been approved to start another Ethiopian adoption!

About four months ago, Tony and I both realized that our hearts were still back in that orphanage half way around the world. However, we just started feeling somewhat normal again...finally over the big adjustment hurdle...figuring out how to raise three kids...and an aggressive, high energy one at that. It was such a crazy thought that we both hesitated to even share it with one another.

About that same time, without our prompting, Mya began voicing her desire for a baby sister that would have "dark skin like Silas". We are in disbelief that our future daughter was born into the heart and mind of her big sister. We prayed, wrestled, and cried (ok, at least I did!). So, here we go...walking by faith that these crazy thoughts are not our own!

July Pics

We spent the 4th of July having a beach bash at our brave aunt and uncle's house. Wouldn't you like to have this many people staying at your house?? :)

A month of firsts:

Silas' first 4th!















First time to eat grilled frog legs!
















Silas' first time to fish.















Birthday boy!! Silas' first birthday with us. :)

Losing Gracie

My husband walked around yesterday in a quiet disbelief as the events of last week came crashing in. Last Monday we were at the funeral of our almost 3 month old niece Grace. The loss was so sudden that it seems surreal. We are the uncle, aunt, cousins...we are not used to seeing her everyday yet our hearts hurt because we were denied getting to know her and because our family is grieving. Tony's sister Patience and our brother in law Matt live in KC. Gracie was and is blessing #3.

I don't think we ever questioned God as to why He chose to take her. We know He doesn't owe us any explanations. He gives and He takes away...His timing...His glory. What we struggle with is knowing how our family is supposed to move on. God promises that He won't give us any more than we can handle. Well, how are they (we) supposed to handle this one? Our kids have been watching Jelly Telly (highly recommend it), and they say that faith is believing who God says He is and believing what God says He will do. Do we have faith in what He promises in His Word?

"Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning: great is your faithfulness." Lamentation 3:22-23

That verse has taken on a whole new meaning for us. When tragedy strikes sometimes it is hard to see God work. Matt and Patience have been so vulnerable through this that we have been blessed to count the ways that God has provided for them, even in the small things. He provided a beautiful, debt free memorial service with awesome friends and family, He prepared the hearts of our other two nieces to understand heaven and rejoice about Gracie meeting Jesus, and we have seen the outpouring of community provide for their daily needs as they seek to feel somewhat normal again.

We need God's grace and mercy to be renewed and rain down EVERY morning...we just stop and ask and see it in the tough times. God is good and His promises are true. So that is how God is going to give them (us) the strength to handle this loss. We count the compassions every morning. We stop and give Him glory for how He has met our every need...today...and then start all over tomorrow.

We want to be a changed family...a family of great faith...a family that believes what God says He will do.

May Recap

May was an exciting month in the Vernon household.

Milestones:

*Tony and I celebrated our 10 year wedding anniversary! My husband's gray hairs are testimony of what an incredible trip it has been!

*Silas is officially completely potty trained. The monthly budget will finally be rid of diapers and pull ups. Hooray! Don't be offended when Silas asks you about your "big boys". He thinks everyone gets a thrill from wearing big boy underwear.

*Cale finished preschool. Is it possible that we have a kindergarten student on our hands? We have really toiled over the decision on where to send him in the fall. Options are great but stressful! We are finally peaceful about having him attend Polk County Christian School again next year. One year at a time...one child at a time...that we can do!

*We left Silas at a sitter's house for the first time (excluding family and Sunday School). Either he did very well or Ms. Debbie offered him much grace! Papa has been our sitter ever since we brought Silas home. It has been monumental in Silas' attachment and stability. Plus with his anger and behavioral issues, I'm not sure anyone but Papa was up for the challenge. :) We praise God that He has grown our son and brought us through that season. We are grateful for my dad, and are also blessed to have Debbie.

Making Memories:

We took a relaxing trip to Alabama with Tony's parents to visit Red and Susan. They are not family by blood, but family by all other definitions. Our stay was full of strawberry pickin', jelly makin', horse back riding, mud puddle jumping, eating, and reclining!

Recent Pics

Happy Easter-not sure why there were forced smiles on this blessed day! :)

Cale is playing soccer at the Y. He scored a goal in his first game. We are just grateful that he likes it!

Our crazy girl! :)

Silas playing in the shower.

Our new niece Grace (Tony's sister's baby)

And yet another niece, Bella (Sarita's brother's). We are so blessed!

Family Update

I thought I'd write a few snippets to let you know what is new with our family.

Cale is still taking piano lessons from mom. I think he has a natural gift for music, but he isn't always real motivated to practice very long. And we are getting sucked into the sports realm and signing him up for spring soccer. We'll see how that turns out! :) His most recent love, however, is legos. He will spend hours with the creator legos that come with step by step directions on how to build various cars. It is neat to see his determination and his long attention span...especially since we haven't seen that on the piano bench!
Mya has had some real emotional issues after Silas has come home. I think she feels like the third wheel most of the time. She used to be Cale's only play mate, and now he shares so many interests with his little brother that the boys seem to be together most of the time. She tends to want to mother the boys and that is not always well received. We have recently signed her up for gymnastics, and she has been a lot braver than we anticipated. Since she still has much weakness in her ankles, I think this time will be good for her physically as well as emotionally. Wednesday nights have become a girls night as mom takes her to class and then we swing by and get a bean burrito for dinner.

Silas continues to grow and expand his vocabulary. Tony and I went on a marriage retreat last weekend (much needed time away-thank you Nona and Granddad) , and he even tried to talk me into staying home by telling me that he had an ear infection, needed medicine, and needed to go to the doctor's office. Where does he get this stuff?? He is definitely the most strong willed out of the kids. He tends to frustrate us the most, but also make us laugh the hardest. I just continue to pray that this passion will be channeled into his love for the Lord someday!

Tony and I are doing some minor home remodeling. Before you feel too sorry for him, I have to say up front that his "honey do" list was only partially my idea...he has contributed just as much as I have! I caught him painting the laundry room wearing this t-shirt.

Weekend Fun

My Valentine spent the weekend in Texas :(...but it was the opportunity of a lifetime. My older brother, Matthew, was able to get three tickets to the NBA All Star game. So my younger brother, Seth, and Tony headed out Friday night. I love it when my hubby can hang with my brothers. Here are some pics from their testosterone filled weekend. :)









Silas has been taking his turn praying at the dinner table. I've been trying to get him on film because it is so adorable, but of course it is a bit distracting when mom whips out the camera! I finally was able to hit play holding the camera under the table and zoom it on him after he was fully engaged in his prayer. Unlike the other kids, I've never caught him with his eyes open. Silas takes it very seriously and will go on and on unless one of us prompts him to say "amen". So, the video below is dark and you have to listen carefully but we captured a little bit of his prayer.

"Thank you, mommy..., daddy...thank you for food....Cale..." muttering..."thank you, food....thank you, food...amen!"

Let it Snow!

Cale was super disappointed that he didn't get to go back to school today...I'm sure he is in the minority! However, it has been a good opportunity for him to show his little bro how to make a good snow ball. Silas loved the snow, but it didn't take long for him to get his fill!